Autumn

It's been six months since I last posted. I really need to get better at this; however, I do have a long story to tell...

Story Number One: Summer

I did end up getting the job at St. Jude and I worked the entire summer genotyping mice in the Immunology department. It was a great experience and I truly enjoyed being part of such an amazing organization. Every morning when I would drive through those gates I felt important and was filled with purpose. Somehow in some way, the work I would do everyday would contribute to the fight against cancer. How rewarding is that? I met fantastic people and really enjoyed getting to know those that I worked with. Eating in the Kay Cafe for lunch was also a great experience. While sad because you are surrounded by patients and their families, you are also surrounded by doctors, nurses, scientists, and others who all have one goal in common: Fighting Cancer. I find that pretty amazing.

Story Number Two: Passing

The title for this segment has a duality about it. The first part of passing refers to my current progress this semester. I am taking Organic Chemistry, Histology, and Intro to Poetry. I went into Organic terrified from all of the horror stories and did not expect to do very well. However, I had an amazing thing happen. I took my exam early due to having a Histology exam scheduled on the same day because I really wanted to do well on both. Turns out, I made a 100 on the Organic exam... the professor wrote on my test, "Alex, you are incredible!" I was blown away. Oh, and I also made a 101.5 on my Histology exam and was told that each essay was "a masterpiece of understanding." Again, blown away because I have never even made so much as an A- on a upper level biology exam, or any biology exam at my school. I'm kind of a B+ student but I will definitely take the A+'s! I actually have my 3rd Histology and Organic exam this week, let's hope the good streak continues.

The second part of passing refers to the more morbid. In my post titled "Hope" I discussed how a patient I had worked with through pretty much their entire stay finally was able to leave and go home and continue her life. However, while home one weekend I was looking at the local news on my mobile phone app and by chance caught a headline that crushed all hope. As it turns out, my patient passed away. I was immediately crushed because we were all pulling for her to fully recover. She had a fiance to marry, a family to return to, a family to begin, a life to resume. All of that gone. I don't know the details of what happened, but I suspect there could have been a number of complications. I know as a part of medicine and as a part of life that people will die, but at this point and for this patient, this wasn't something that I wanted to accept. I really wish I knew why, but I will never know and never really have a sense of, well.. closure if that makes sense. I thought I had closure when I imagined her home and happy but all of that was disintegrated. My paper lantern of hope burned up before it had a chance to float away.

Story Number Three: The Present

Finals are inching nearer and nearer as well as deadlines and due dates. It's all a bit overwhelming and there is literally so much to worry about that I've become completely disfunctional. I have not completed any work all weekend and I have an exam on Monday, on Friday, and then a huge paper due on the 22nd of November right before Thanksgiving Break which I haven't even started. Let's just say I'm a bit screwed. And don't forget all of the poetry work. So here I am, at nearly 1AM blogging about it. I guess we can call it therapeutic procrastination? Does that work or is it just another excuse not to do something I should be doing? Whatever the case, sleep is therapeutic and I'm definitely not going to procrastinate on that.

Goodnight!